Insurance Company error

So it turned out that my insurance company made a mistake with me and many, many others.  So my primary medication is not required to be only received by mail order.  They just needed me to call them and then they did the correction while I was on the phone.  Why this error wasn’t communicated to the national help center, so anyone needing help on Sunday, would have been re-assured that their maintenance medication would be available — is probably because everyone is too busy or didn’t even think about how the error was effecting individual policyholders … not from intentional carelessness.  I’m glad it is resolved.

Got all but one of my tasks done over the weekend AND am physically – emotionally feeling the effects

— more dissociative amnesia (difficulty with time and days/nights)

— more dissociation (HF and Becky not staying present)

— increased severity of brain pain on right-side lateral edge of vision center and posterior edge of speech center and having issues with finding words to speak with and vision is not clear

— more general fatigue


My right hip pain, bilateral upper leg pain and the wobbly gait has been present for a few years now.  Since the 2 foot reflexology treatments alleviated the severe upper leg pain, I’ve decided to go forward with more physical treatment.  I am receiving 3 lumbar traction treatments per week for this week and the next.  The initial chiropractic assessment showed propriceptorial deficiencies on the right-side below the waist and neuromuscular deficiencies directly connected to suspected spinal stenosis at L3 and L4.

The treating chiropractor doesn’t understand the ‘trauma’ link, but I am coping with the CPTSD aggravations so far. They are altered taste; and anxious talkativeness.

I trade services with a massage therapist that does energy work on me weekly.  He knows my psychotherapist, who was able to explain to him the best way to do energy work on us.  So instead of directly addressing specific complaints with massage therapy and gemmotherapy, it’s best to match my energy frequency and send this energy to me via his hands on my feet or neck or cradling my head.  When the frequency is matched, then he can feel my energetic system ‘speaking’ about how much intensity to use and when to cease a particular session.  The 3 different energy workers have commented about how my energetic system ‘speaks’ and how fast I respond.  This week’s energy treatment resolved the speech issue during the treatment and 36 hours post-treatment clear vision returned.




Misplacing Objects

Finished “About Me” page

One of the frustrating things about my daily living as highly functional Me is misplacing objects.  As a child my mother taught me how to mentally walk through my activities so I could learn where I left an object.  Of course, it was only helpful if I had access to those memories.  Now, I ask internally for help locating a misplaced object.  An answer may quickly come or not.  When no information is forthcoming, then I have learned to just let time pass and usually the object will be discovered.  But if I can’t let go of the desire or the actuality of hunting for the item, then usually it takes longer for the object to be shown to me.  Since I’ve learned this, I usually don’t get upset.  But the can opener is missing and I need it to prepare food.  Grrrhhh!

I’m continuing to manage my acidic saliva by dissolving Xylitol mints in mouth.  My tongue and buccal areas feel marginally better.  As long as I consume food that I have made from scratch, then the presence of food does not stimulate very acidic saliva.

I have been experiencing heightened body memories.  I really really dislike this particular sensation in my vagina.  It is also painful and distracting.  Also, I have experienced my ‘altered taste’ off and on this last week.  I’ve experienced difficulty remembering the day of the week.  This is often an indication that I am ‘losing time.’

Anxiety is high.  My landlord needs access to my apartment so an insurance agent can assess the house.  My current landlord lives in a different state and is the daughter of my original landlord.  My original landlord unexpectedly died about 15 months ago.  We’re quite aware of the disordered state of our apartment.  Since 2013 we have limited energy, which has limited our abilities to properly care for ourselves and our living space.  I am frustrated.  I think there should be help for someone like me.  If there exists help with daily living for someone like me, then I haven’t looked or asked in the those places, yet.  So tomorrow we will take frequent breaks while we push ourselves beyond exhaustion to make the apartment clean and ordered to meet basic expectations.


‘Altered Taste in my Mouth’ Reoccurs

I’m still sleeping 6-7 hours overnight.  It’s a blessed experience.  It feels like the 24-hour day is shorter – which I’ve experienced before as no longer a need to fill as much time every day.  Although I have noticed my daily anxiety level is higher, not sure where and how I can affect it.

Last few days, I have been experiencing the ‘altered taste in my mouth’ thing.  The ‘altered taste’ has been experienced once or twice every few months for many years.  During these time periods, food and water do not taste as expected and generally everything tastes like bland mud.  Most of the time it starts ‘out-of-the-blue’.  Sometimes it seems to be triggered by our processing of traumatic memories or specific energy work on or around our brain.

Since my foot reflexology session about 7-10 days ago, I have not experienced upper leg pain and seem to be able to walk longer without discomfort.  Although my right hip’s range of motion is still reduced, as I continue to have difficulty raising my right leg to get into my car.  Yesterday, I received another foot reflexology treatment.  During the treatment I felt more energy flowing through my pelvis and was able to stay present.  In the past I haven’t tolerated energy movement through my pelvis; it always was quite triggering and I would immediately feel disturbed and could dissociate.

In my knitting realm, I discovered  All they ask is you knit or crochet a scarf at least 5 inches wide and 65 inches long AND that is soft and comforting.  I will be making a scarf and I’ll post a picture when it’s finished.

“Threads of Compassion is a loosely connected group of survivors of sexual violence who desire to offer comfort and support to recent victims. The idea is simple. Anyone whose life has been affected by sexual assault or abuse is welcome to knit or crochet a scarf which will then be given to a victim of sexual violence when they enter the hospital for emergency treatment.”